A Season of Learning about Parenting, it seems

Each day I run into parents with kids in public, I become more grateful to the parents I know here in Kutztown [as well as to my own!]  who discipline their children.

I spent three-quarters of an hour at a large-scale retailer today, hoping to replenish my supply of argyle socks [with some success!], and whilst perusing the toothpaste department, I heard a sort of squealing and fierce screaming and intense whining/complaining.  The banter came from at least 10 aisles down from where I stood.  The volume of the screaming increased as I made my way toward the registers; it didn't sound as though the small demon even stopped to take a breath.  I expected to see perhaps a 24 to 30-month old toddler, very upset about not getting his or her own way; clutching to some junky item the parent didn't want to buy.

But no!

I saw a child that looked about 4 or 5 years old, lying on the floor, with a grandmotherly-looking woman pulling her by the arm to drag her squeaking sneakers across the linoleum.

Oh, it was awful.  And the screaming did not end.

I've gotten used to small-child-screaming from my landlady's toddler.  She screams when she doesn't get her way, or she'll become upset when she's caught doing something wrong, but usually she's done and over it within five to fifteen minutes.

This kid at the store kept screaming.  Grandma swung the kid up into her arms and had to carry the kicking & screaming beast out the front door.  Everyone in the area stared, but the child felt no shame in assaulting her grandmother to get her own way.

I wished the cashier a good day and went out to see a very, very angry woman [the Mom?] tell off the little banshee for her bad behavior.  This resulted in even louder screaming, to be heard by patrons of every business in the plaza parking lot.

I could see very clearly that the child was used to getting her own way, to wearing down the adults with personal-behavior-terrorism until she received what she wanted from them.  She had no fear of the adults.  She understood the anger, and felt upset by this, but there was no repentance for the awful behavior.  There was no, "Sorry mom, I was a real brat in the store.  Will you forgive me?"

So anyways, I'm real grateful to the parents who give their kids choices, to do as they're told or to face the consequences [be that a timeout, sent to bed without dinner, a spanking, more chores, etc].  They'll grow up to be socially functioning teenagers and adults.  The brats who complain til they get their way will probably become mean girls and dbag frat dudes.

I can see so clearly that a healthy fear of discipline leads to respect & obedience toward the parent. I understand that not all parents punish corporately, but my friends with the best behaved kids happen to do so.  It's no longer the day of, "Boy, bring me a switch!"  But the fear of The Wooden Spoon seems to drive kids toward more gracious behavior and more of love through actions in serving & obeying their parents.

So, mom & dad, thanks for spanking me when I deserved it.