The 6 Myths of Christmas

This season, I assisted my mother-in-law to liberally decorate their home with all things Christmas.  I think she owns about four-hundred different incarnations of Santa Claus.  I'm not even exaggerating.  Trimming the tree (and the rest of the house) has led me to a few observations about some inaccurate facets of Americanized Christmas.

6.  Joseph:  husband of Mary, professional shepherd.

  These two nativity scenes (among many others) portray Joseph holding a shepherd's crook.  While shepherds were present that night in Bethlehem, Joseph himself was a carpenter by trade.

5.  Someone received twelve drummers, eleven pipers, etc. for Christmas, and loved it all so much that she wrote a song about it.
  Actually, "The Twelve Days of Christmas" is about spiritual gifts, not material presents.  What would you do with those ten lords leaping around your house, anyway?  Read the full story here.

4.  Angels look like either naked babies or winged ladies in dresses.
  I grew up in a home where we placed an angel on top of our Christmas tree.  It was the most beautiful, delicate doll... that I wasn't allowed to play with (too fragile).  She had long, blonde hair; perfect, porcelain skin; and a shiny, white, satin dress.  I'd cluster the other angel ornaments near the top of the tree - cute, glittery angels.
  However, the angels described in scripture seem more like fiery, dangerous warriors.  In many instances of an angel appearing to people, the angel has to calm them down, saying, "Don't be afraid!"  Apparently, angels are pretty terrifying!  Matthew describes the one guarding Jesus' empty tomb as having an "appearance like lightening."  The cherubim in Genesis 3 guard the entrance to Eden with a flaming sword.  The seraphim in Isaiah 6 have six wings each, and fly around shouting about how holy God is.  Wow.  These heavenly creatures sound a lot more exciting than naked-baby cherubs with chubby, pink cheeks!

3.  The Magi showed up the day Jesus was born.
  Matthew 2:1 - "Now after Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judea in the days of Herod the king, behold, wise men from the east came to Jerusalem."  Verse 11 actually says they went into the house to worship Him - so the Magi never actually hung out in the barn with the holy family)  After this, Herod ordered all male children age two and under to be killed.  (Joseph led his family to Egypt to hide out for a while).

2.  Three Wise Men came to visit baby Jesus.
  The Biblical account's inclusion of the Magi's three gifts for the Christ-child has led us to believe that there were three wise men.  Additionally, the well-known carol "We Three Kings" re-enforces this view by its language:  each man brings one gift.  "Born a King on Bethlehem's plain; gold I bring to crown Him again,"  "Frankincense to offer have I," "Myrrh is mine..."
  However, the Biblical story of Christmas and Epiphany doesn't actually give a number of wise men, only the number of gifts.  It could actually have been two men carrying three gifts, or four men, or twenty.

1.  Santa Claus.

  There's been a myth going around, saying that parents are the ones leaving presents under Christmas trees on December 24th.  Isn't that ridiculous?  I personally think it's just absurd to assume parents would be interested in building dozens of toys, wrapping them all perfectly, and stacking them in the living room in the middle of the night.  Don't you agree?  I can't imagine leaving that great a job of gift-giving to anyone but Santa himself.  You can watch this documentary for more information.

  If you have any additional observations about the holidays, I'd love to hear them - please comment!  I hope your Christmas is joyful, and I leave you to enjoy this video (Michael Caine's finest performance):

Engagement

Greg and I are finally engaged, after having been a'courtin' for the past three years.  Yay!

Family celebrations ensued at the Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays, with many toasts and much story-telling and support from everyone.  I think the wedding will be a great, fun party with all these excited family members, plus good friends from home, summer camp, church and college.  We are very excited!

Even more exciting is the fact that we have a place booked.  Yes!  In the most difficult month to find an available venue, my parents succeeded in nabbing a catering place with a beautiful hall, great yard with many pine trees and a kind and detail-oriented catering lady.  We're stopping by her open house today to sample cakes.  This will probably be the most fun part of the wedding-preparation process.  Yum.

Besides that, we've got my parents' church reserved for the early afternoon on our special day, which I think will prove just perfect for the size crowd we'll have there.  Next up:  starting pre-marital counseling with our pastor, planning the ceremony with him and our Camp Hill pastor and a church wedding planner, picking out attire and flowers and making invitations and whatnot.  Oh boy!  I'm actually sort of excited to finish our Save-the-Date postcards, and later, make up our lovely printed invites; it's been a long time since I've dedicated myself to a design project of any sort.

What a  busy time!!  I'm glad we still have eight whole months to finish working on all this stuff.

And now, off to brunch and taste cakes!

With what do you wipe your butt?

Guess I never really thought about the fact that we literally send trees down the toilet every day. It makes me want to stop pooping! Or figure out an alternative...

American taste for soft toilet roll 'worse than driving Hummers'

The tenderness of the delicate American buttock is causing more environmental devastation than the country's love of gas-guzzling cars, fast food or McMansions, according to green campaigners. At fault, they say, is the US public's insistence on extra-soft, quilted and multi-ply products when they use the bathroom.

Greenpeace offers a guide comparing recycled post-consumer vs. virgin paper pulp toilet papers here.