Showing posts with label Bible. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Bible. Show all posts

20 April 2015

Paschal Homily

For born as a son, and led forth as a lamb,
Sacrificed as a sheep, buried as a man,
He rose from the dead as God,
Being by nature God and Man.

Who is all things:
In that he judges, Law,
in that he teaches, Word,
in that he saves, Grace,
in that he begets, Father
in that he is begotten, Son,
in that he suffers, the sacrificial sheep,
in that he is buried, Man,
in that he arises, God.

This is Jesus Christ, to whom belongs the glory to the ages of ages.


[Melito of Sardis, Paschal Homily, 169 A.D.]

12 January 2014

Pursuing Peace











I love reading TIME magazine.  They cover news from all around the globe, illustrate figures with infographics (oh, how I love looking at them!), and provide a bit of humor, too (thanks, Joel Stein).

This week, TIME's article, "2014 User's Guide" has some exciting predictions for this year:
  • The U.S. Capitol building will begin a two-year restoration process.
  • Google Glass will reach national levels of distribution.
  • El Nino (Spanish for... "the Nino") will warm the Pacific to record temperatures.
  • Kohlrabi will replace kale as the trendy, hipster vegetable of the year.
  • More states will legalize recreational marijuana (OR, CA, AZ, and RI, in particular).
  • Private space exploration companies will continue to probe the cosmos.
  • Girls born in 2014 will have names ending in "-lyn, as in Marilyn or Madilyn."  Children born this year may, for the first time in history, have a shorter life expectancy than their parents... due to obesity.
  • Skype will replace non-emergency doctor visits.  Doctors can asses symptoms and diagnose illnesses through "telemedicine" - a technology that's actually been used for years to serve remote fishermen along the Gulf of Maine, by the nurses of the Maine Seacoast Mission.
Besides all these global happenings...  What will you do this year?

It's a question I have been asking myself.


I've been pondering a statement that TIME quoted, from Pope Francis:  "True peace is not... a lovely 'facade' which conceals conflicts and divisions.  Peace calls for daily commitment."


Pope Francis echoes the words of Psalm 34:14:  "Seek peace and pursue it."  As I consider my goals for 2014, a life of peace seems a worthy endeavor.  More than that, a daily commitment to prayer and seeking Christ's peace will be my goal for the year.


Scripture calls us to live peaceably with our neighbor.  Again, peace isn't merely the absence of conflict, but a daily commitment to support and love one another.

Romans 12:17-18 - "Repay no one evil for evil, but give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all.  If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all."
II Corinthians 13:11 - "Aim for restoration, comfort one another, agree with one another, live in peace; and the God of love and peace will be with you."
God reconciles His people to Himself; and He also wants His people to be reconciled to one another.  This can take place at the family level... and at a global level.  A huge part of living a wise, peaceful life is praying for our neighbors and our leaders.

"I urge that supplications, prayers, intercessions, and thanksgivings be made for all people, for kings and all who are in high positions, that we may lead a peaceful and quiet life, godly and dignified in every way."  (I Timothy 2:1-2)  This year, I will pray for those in need of reconciliation, and will work toward restoration with those in my own life.  Won't you join me?


Pray for peace in places like Sudan (where civil war rages) and Uganda (whose government has enacted violent land grabs from its agrarian citizens - see SolidarityUganda.com for more info).  Pray for the U.S. government to end its reckless policing of countries around the globe.  Pray for local communities to join in unity, strangers joining as friends supporting one another. Pray for the end of oppression and exploitation.  Pray for missionaries and churches to reach out, love those around them, and bring the peace of Christ to many.

My prayer is that God will change me, giving me more compassion for His people and endurance in prayer.
Not only is prayer necessary for peacemaking, but prayer can indeed lead to a deep, godly inner peace. Philippians 4 tells us, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

I pray that God gives me the wisdom to work toward peace. As I enter a new season in a new place, it will be essential to lean upon the Lord and His wisdom as I seek peaceable relationships with new friends, co-workers, and neighbors. In the fall, I'll begin grad school - academically studying the Word of God. I pray that this new wisdom will bring me a softened heart and hands prepared to work toward reconciliation.
James 3:17-18 - "But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere.  And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace."
May 2014 be filled with the pursuit of knowledge, compassion, and humility... with much prayer... to better love and serve those around us in peace.



[Be sure to check out other bloggers' aspirations for the coming year at I Don't Have a Clue, but I'm Finding Out!]

Carolina in My Mind


...also, in reality.

Husband (Hubby?  Hubskin?  Hub?) and I spent a week adventuring around Charlotte.  Our intent was to learn more about our grad school and to find somewhere to live.  We thought we'd spend long days perusing dozens of apartments...

...but we fell in love with the first one we saw.

Four things we experienced for the first time:

1. Burning a Christmas tree - MUCH more exciting than composting it.

2. A January thunderstorm - I did NOT know this was possible.

3. Someone calling the Civil War "the war of Northern aggression."  (What does that even mean?). Apparently, Southerners continue - to this day - to justify a war that took place 150 years ago by it being about states' freedom to choose... to enslave people.  This makes NO sense to me.

4. Shrimp & grits.  This was the best thing I have EVER eaten.

All in all, I am pumped to move to the South.  There is such a deep culture of both music and food (when asked what some of my favorite PA foods were, I replied, "...cheeseteak?  Hershey's?  Scrapple?"  Penna Dutch cooking has NOTHING on that of the South) and many, many lovely people.  Getting into seminary to truly learn the Bible and how to study it is fueling my sense of adventure and anticipation for ministry.  "For the LORD gives wisdom; from His mouth come knowledge and understanding."  (Proverbs 2:6)

Feeling a sense of solidarity with Mr. Taylor...


Can't you feel the sunshine?
Can't you just feel the moonshine?

27 December 2013

One Big Lesson from 2013

2013:  a whirlwind year for me.  My husband and I moved twice.  We worked in camp ministry from March to December.  We decided to go back to school.  It all went by quickly, but it felt like a ton of stuff happened!

When I look back on the lessons I learned this year, I think I have quite a few things I could discuss.  I learned lots about how unqualified I am for working in ministry.  I learned that college students can completely amaze you when they are living fully for the Lord.  I learned how hard it is to be in charge of a summer camp program (read:  it's a lot less fun than counseling).  I learned how to make  marshmallows.  Through study of James, I learned how importantly God sees our generosity - and how much I suck at giving.


Moving twice within the year taught me quite a few things about minimizing personal possessions.  Renting and loading and transporting all that can fit within a U-haul and a Subaru is not necessarily fun, but definitely a profitable task.


Part of the minimization process included A LOT of wardrobe decisions.  This leads me to my biggest lesson of the year:



How to Dress Like a Grown-Up

I had always been that girl who dressed in garish colors and gaudy patterns, because I considered my style "artsy."  After getting married, my husband (with a real eye for design) informed me that a plaid skirt, a paisley blouse, and striped tights do not comprise a decent outfit.  I raided my wardrobe, pulling out many blouses, skirts, dresses, cardigans, and pants.  Barely any plain, solid-colored items existed there!  It proved my poor shopping track-record:  I selected clothing items individually, based on each piece's particular beauty (which, to me, meant purple and pink paisleys or red-and-green plaids).

One time, I bought a skirt that I thought was amazing, at my college town's mod consignment shop.  It was a knee-length A-line... and it had POCKETS.   Pockets!!  The fabric itself was cotton, a buttery yellow with a delicate, art nouveau-esque blue-and-purple print.  By itself, it may have been a pretty skirt, but it matched NOTHING.  I thought,  "So... this doesn't match any top I own.  Or any top in the world.  I'll save the fabric and make it into a throw pillow or something."   (Consider the fact that I don't know how to sew).  This year, I finally forced myself to part with it.  I had owned it for nine years.  I think I had worn it about five or six times, total.



That was one of many ridiculous articles of clothing I owned that didn't match anything.  Therefore, since we had to move twice within this year... my wardrobe changed.  I got rid of all my tie-dye.  Yes, a part of me still longs for my beautifully crafted tee-shirts... but my husband prefers that his wife not look like she's still in junior high.

Solid colors were in.  Basic colors were in.  Simple articles of clothing were in.

Pink was OUT.

I did purchase a few new items this year:  black cigarette pants, grey flats, a grey cardigan, a few v-neck women's tees (more flattering than jr high soccer tee-shirts, right?).  I learned that grey is my new favorite color for basic items.  A grey pair of shoes can match with black, brown, or blue pants!  It's like magic!



I surveyed my favorite blouses and cardigans, and then made sure I could match them each with several skirts and pants.  The rest... went away!  The ridiculous patterns, the ugly colors (no shade of pink or coral will ever look good on me), the fun colors that didn't match anything else... all went into the donation bin.  What I was left with was a simple, comfortable, well-fitting, and (dare I say) stylish wardrobe.  I can put together decent-looking outfits with so much ease now.

(If you're rolling your eyes, thinking, "This girl is so shallow, the biggest thing she learned in a year was how to dress?"  ...you're right.  But with my history of hoarding, getting rid of so many clothes was a big deal to me.  And dressing nicely - for the first time ever - was a great result).

It felt very freeing filling up a second massive bin of clothing to donate (to the local women's shelter).  I had so many things - even warm, toasty, winter clothes - that I so rarely wore.  The best way to put it is that it felt right to share all these earthly possessions with folks who actually needed them.


My true inspiration came from a great sermon (heard at Great Island Presbyterian Church) on James 5.  The "moth-eaten" clothing and riches were decomposing not necessarily because their owners were wealthy, but because they didn't put their possessions to good use.  A closet filled with unworn clothing should be emptied and given to the naked.  A pantry full of more food than one could eat within a year could be given to the hungry.  A family's extra car could be given to a person in need of transportation to a job.


So I guess the underlying lesson beneath my wardrobe changes is that... too much is too much.  We've all heard (in magazines; on Pinterest) that if "you haven't worn it within the year, get rid of it."  We all have our favorite jeans, favorite tee-shirts, favorite sweaters:  the ones we wear at least once or twice a week.  Decide for yourself!  Pick those favorite things and key wardrobe items, and discard the extra.  It'll help you see your closet more clearly.  And sorting the surplus clothes to give to those in need is worth it!


How to Dress Like a Grown-Up:  Simplify.  Wear what looks good on you.  And share your extra clothes with those who may need them.

25 December 2013

The 6 Myths of Christmas

This season, I assisted my mother-in-law to liberally decorate their home with all things Christmas.  I think she owns about four-hundred different incarnations of Santa Claus.  I'm not even exaggerating.  Trimming the tree (and the rest of the house) has led me to a few observations about some inaccurate facets of Americanized Christmas.

6.  Joseph:  husband of Mary, professional shepherd.




  These two nativity scenes (among many others) portray Joseph holding a shepherd's crook.  While shepherds were present that night in Bethlehem, Joseph himself was a carpenter by trade.

5.  Someone received twelve drummers, eleven pipers, etc. for Christmas, and loved it all so much that she wrote a song about it.

  Actually, "The Twelve Days of Christmas" is about spiritual gifts, not material presents.  What would you do with those ten lords leaping around your house, anyway?  Read the full story here.

4.  Angels look like either naked babies or winged ladies in dresses.

  I grew up in a home where we placed an angel on top of our Christmas tree.  It was the most beautiful, delicate doll... that I wasn't allowed to play with (too fragile).  She had long, blonde hair; perfect, porcelain skin; and a shiny, white, satin dress.  I'd cluster the other angel ornaments near the top of the tree - cute, glittery angels.
  However, the angels described in scripture seem more like fiery, dangerous warriors.  In many instances of an angel appearing to people, the angel has to calm them down, saying, "Don't be afraid!"  Apparently, angels are pretty terrifying!  Matthew describes the one guarding Jesus' empty tomb as having an "appearance like lightening."  The cherubim in Genesis 3 guard the entrance to Eden with a flaming sword.  The seraphim in Isaiah 6 have six wings each, and fly around shouting about how holy God is.  Wow.  These heavenly creatures sound a lot more exciting than naked-baby cherubs with chubby, pink cheeks!

3.  The Magi showed up the day Jesus was born.

  Matthew 2:1 - "Now after Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judea in the days of Herod the king, behold, wise men from the east came to Jerusalem."  Verse 11 actually says they went into the house to worship Him - so the Magi never actually hung out in the barn with the holy family)  After this, Herod ordered all male children age two and under to be killed.  (Joseph led his family to Egypt to hide out for a while).

2.  Three Wise Men came to visit baby Jesus.

  The Biblical account's inclusion of the Magi's three gifts for the Christ-child has led us to believe that there were three wise men.  Additionally, the well-known carol "We Three Kings" re-enforces this view by its language:  each man brings one gift.  "Born a King on Bethlehem's plain; gold I bring to crown Him again,"  "Frankincense to offer have I," "Myrrh is mine..."
  However, the Biblical story of Christmas and Epiphany doesn't actually give a number of wise men, only the number of gifts.  It could actually have been two men carrying three gifts, or four men, or twenty.

1.  Santa Claus.


  There's been a myth going around, saying that parents are the ones leaving presents under Christmas trees on December 24th.  Isn't that ridiculous?  I personally think it's just absurd to assume parents would be interested in building dozens of toys, wrapping them all perfectly, and stacking them in the living room in the middle of the night.  Don't you agree?  I can't imagine leaving that great a job of gift-giving to anyone but Santa himself.  You can watch this documentary for more information.

  If you have any additional observations about the holidays, I'd love to hear them - please comment!  I hope your Christmas is joyful, and I leave you to enjoy this video (Michael Caine's finest performance):

20 December 2013

Twelve Days of Christmas: Part II

Today is December 20th.  We have decorated our Christmas tree!  It is hard to believe that Christmas is only five days away.  Have you been counting down the twelve days of Christmas?



If so, you may have been led astray by television movie marathons and holiday commercialism!

The Twelve Days of Christmas are actually those days following December 25th.  Traditionally, Christmas was celebrated for twelve whole days, leading up to Epiphany (the day the church commemorates the Wise Men's arrival to visit the Christ-child) on January 6th.

Sadly, Christmas - in America - has turned into an entire month of shopping, busyness, decorating, baking, and anticipation... all for just one day!  As soon as Boxing Day rolls around, the Christmas music is cut off the radio stations, decor is boxed up once more, and we head into the boring part of the winter season.

It makes me sad!  Why don't we have twelve days of celebration?  Why not give people a break from work or school for twelve days of family time and relaxation?  Certainly, the birth of God Himself in humblest human form is worth more than one day of celebration per year.

Well, I know the real reason we don't celebrate Christmas for twelve days.  It's because no one would make any extra money off of it.  All the corporations just want everyone to stress out and buy as much as they can in the month leading up to one day of blowout gift-giving and feasting.

I'd rather we feast for twelve days straight.  I'd love it!  Turkeys, hams, prime rib, duck, goose...

...and the cookies!!  THE COOKIES!!!

Anyways...  I challenge myself (and you, dear reader) to consider Christmas a twelve day-long festival, rather than a twenty-four hour holiday.  Contemplate and worship our wonderful Savior, who "though He was in the form of God, did not consider equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied Himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men."  (Philippians 2:6-7).  Compare Philippians 2 and Psalm 8, and be blown away by the awesome power AND complete humility of God.  The all-powerful Creator of the entire universe... was born a helpless baby in a barn... to show that He cares for us.

On the other hand... if you prefer the less Jesus-y, more Santa Claus-y side of Christmas... let's live out twelve beautiful days of gratitude, expressing thankfulness and love to our family and friends; as well as giving generously to those around us.  Merry Christmas, friends!

07 September 2012

defining Christianity

These days, I am hesitant to label myself as a "Christian."

A weighty reason that I am is the Republican party's use of the name of God to attract "moral voters."  Voting for wealthy, white men in business suits has nothing to do with emulating Jesus Christ.

Another reason is the damage the Church has caused over centuries of history.  Many people (at least in America) hate or disagree with Christians because they've been hurt by them.  All Christians are hypocrites.

Unfortunately, there are so many Christians who will not admit their own hypocrisy.  From small issues, like not forgiving quickly enough or vying to win theological arguments; to massive ones, like picketing hatefully in the name of God.  I don't think God could ever agree with those who hate.

Personal disclaimer:  I AM A HYPOCRITE.  I am messed-up; I am bitter; I am selfish.

These days, I prefer to call myself a Christ-follower.  A follower of Jesus.  That's the original denotation of the word Christian.

Chris·tian  [kris-chuhn] 
1.  (adj.) of, pertaining to, or derived from Jesus Christ  or His teachings: a Christian faith.
7.  (noun) a person who believes in Jesus Christ;  adherent of Christianity
 
It's hard to identify oneself with a word so often used for morality or church-going or slightly-less-evil-than-most-people.

A great essay on the misuse of the word Christian can be found here.

Definition:  CHRISTIANITY is following the teachings of Jesus of Nazareth and embracing Him as Lord.  (Lord:  one's master/ruler/care-taker/provider)

True Christianity has nothing to do with following rules!  It is heartbreaking that this is such a common misconception.  It is commonly perceived as such because there are too many preachers or Sunday school teachers telling their children that if they behave, God will be happy.

Following Jesus means accepting His grace.  He already KNOWS that we will break rule after rule, every single day, and yet He still offers us love and life.  He enables us to quit living for ourselves and grasp for the truth and beauty and eternity He gives.

Look around you.  If you're inside, step out for a moment.  How massive is that maple tree?  How many birds are singing?  Can you count the blades of fragrant grass beneath your feet?  Do you have any idea how many different species of insects are living within your tiny acre of Earth?

How amazing is it that God created so much beauty?  He created it all to woo us to Him!  ...to show us that He does love us and wants us to enjoy life!  Remember the last time you coasted down a steep hill on a bike - how thrilling and breezy and breathtaking!  Swimming in the ocean is one of the best ways to feel miniscule and entirely overwhelmed by the Earth's size and the fact that there are other bathers dipping their toes in the SAME water in England, Morocco, South Africa, Brazil!

I cannot fathom a simple "big bang" throwing dust together to form this world.  It is simply too gorgeous and astounding.  It must have been done by the Creator's Hand.

Religion is defined in two places in the Bible:

"Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world." (James 1:27)

"But if a widow has children or grandchildren, these should learn first of all to put their religion into practice by caring for their own family and so repaying their parents and grandparents, for this is pleasing to God." (I Timothy 5:4)

True religion means taking care of other people.  Take care of your family; take care of the needy.  Don't become jaded by the sin (selfish behavior of every person on Earth) you see around you.

Going to church is not in the Bible's definition.

God isn't even mentioned.

Christianity is not a religion.

It is a free life of enjoying God and His people and His world.

It is following Jesus' commands when He says,

"Let your light shine before others." (Matthew 5:16)
"Go and be reconciled to (your brother or sister)." (Matthew 5:24)
"But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you." (Matthew 5:44)
"Love your neighbor as yourself." (Luke 10:27)

"The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy;
I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.
 I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep."  (John 10:10-11)

...and so many other life-giving things.

Real Christianity is a life of redemption, reconciliation, love, mercy and grace.

It is learning from and loving Jesus Christ.

For more on Jesus and life with Him, read Waking the Dead, Crazy Love, Because He Loves Me and the Holy Bible.  Listen to Derek Webb's album She Must and Shall Go Free.

biblegateway.com is a great online resource for reading God's love letters to us.

24 September 2009

wealth

i see a t.v. preacher promoting his 'financial breakthrough bible' and the 'four miracles god will release into your life'. before that, he proclaimed God's coming judgement on the u.s. for its inappropriate sex and abortion.

i look once more at this man, shouting into his microphone, wearing a great big red silk tie, an enormous gold ring on his finger, and an expensive-looking suit that covers his enormous body.

my confession:  i eat more than my body needs.  it's true.  where in my caloric intake does ice cream play a part in aiding the nutrition of my body?  it does not.  i call myself out: i'm a sinner who eats more than i need to.

the increasing reality of americans' obsession with food can be clearly seen in their volume.  cars become suvs [for suburban commuters] to accomodate the size of passengers.  rollercoasters now boast rows of larger seats for their guests.  tv channels that once provided science education now air programs about 800+ pound persons' addictions to take-out, their bed-bound lives, their gastric bypass surgeries, and their deaths.

it is easy to point out obese people and their obvious problem: food addiction.  but we must think on our own selves as well.  how much are we eating?  what money are we spending frivolously that could be used to help the poor - as Jesus asks us to?

if one person who purchases a cup of coffee three to four times a week gives up the java and puts that money towards a poor child; that person could sponsor a kid in africa for his or her education, healthcare, food and more... for years.

Jesus calls us to love God and love our neighbor.  more specifically, He calls us to do three things to honor God:  pray, give, fast.  i admit, i struggle to do all three of those.  it may be difficult because of the implications our western society puts on us as its citizens, fueling our selfish, sinful nature.

1. pray - prayer constitutes the simple act of quieting the mind and communing with God. listening to Him, and speaking with Him [beyond asking for trivial things & saying thanks for dinner].  how do we achieve quiet?  put down the crackberry, hush the tweeting, log off of facebook.  turn off the mobile phone, step outside, lie down in the grass and be quiet.  do that for more than 10 minutes and find out how much you hear.

2. give - God wants us to take care of the misfortunate because it brings honor to His name.
  instinct tells us that the man on the street asking for change will use it the next minute to buy booze or crack.  does Jesus ask us to judge what he'll do with that money?  if we're honest with ourselves, as much as we think we work hard to "earn" money, we can't deny that God gave us the skills... and provided education... and put us in the job... and He's the one who truly earned us our paychecks.  the earth is the Lord's, and everything in it.  even two dollars in your pocket belongs to God - let His will be done when we give to strangers.

3. fast - this one is the most oft ignored among american Christ-followers.  we don't think about *not* eating, mostly because we have in our country a ridiculous abundance of food.  God spoke to the prophet isaiah, telling him that He wants a fast that's pure - a heart that wants to give up food so it can give that food to the hungry.  He says if we do this, "then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear.  then your righteousness will go before you, and the glory of the Lord will be your rear guard."  awesome, awesome things happen when we choose the righteous path.  what's holding us back?

09 April 2009

A bad potluck dish

Hello! I know that everyone loves potlucks/pot blessings/covered dish/bring-food-to-share dinners, so of course everyone must be familiar with the one dish on the table that looks a little funky and slightly untouched for that reason. Before you take another sympathy scoop from that particular dish at your next potluck, read the story of the original icky potluck entree:

Elisha returned to Gilgal and there was a famine in that region. While the company of the prophets was meeting with him, he said to his servant, "Put on the large pot and cook some stew for these men."

One of them went out into the fields to gather herbs and found a wild vine. He gathered some of its gourds and filled the fold of his cloak. When he returned, he cut them up into the pot of stew, though no one knew what they were. The stew was poured out for the men, but as they began to eat it, they cried out, "O man of God, there is death in the pot!" And they could not eat it.

Elisha said, "Get some flour." He put it into the pot and said, "Serve it to the people to eat." and there was noting harmful in the pot."

(2 Kings 4:38-41)


Jell-O/marshmallow salad, anyone?

20 October 2008

Let's Make a Weekend of It

This weekend I went to Kutztown to visit some friends. It involved piercings, spending time with my man, new & old friends, "lunch meat casserole", Man on Fire, a Matt Reffie original sermon, and sushi. Getting away from the midstate for a few days was hugely rejuvenating. My life has been lacking challenges as of late, and it was a breath of fresh air to get away from home.

On Sunday morning Reffie preached on engagement - in particular, Jesus' parable on "the kingdom of heaven is like a bunch of bridesmaids waiting for their friend's groom to show up." Half of them didn't have enough fuel for their torches, so they went to the store to get some and ended up missing the party. Engagement isn't about waiting around for your wedding day, it's about preparing: calling the caterer, making hair appointments, getting facials, working out to look good in your gown [and out of it, afterward]; renting a tux, working hard, saving money, preparing a home for your bride. Jesus told His disciples that He was going to His Father's house to prepare a room for us. He's getting ready for us, His bride. Are we getting ready for Him?

That sermon was refreshingly challenging & convicting. Thanks, Cornerstone.

I spent today resting after a crazy weekend, and in studying the Word, especially in preparation for girls' small group on Wednesday. Our discussion topic is prayer. What would be your input about it?

For your listening pleasure, a beautiful snippet of a John Piper talk:

07 October 2008

What's going on?

Things becoming more constant:
  • earning some money
  • hanging out with youth group kids
  • singing
  • drinking tea [thank you, autumn]
  • obsessively reading SCL
  • wondering why the temptation to regret decisions and re-face them again is trying to squeeze into my line of vision
  • wakening to some strange dreams. hm.
It's time to get excited about sweaters and deliciously comfortable socks. Cool, but not yet slushy cold - fall in PA is a good time.

Working in retail is actually pretty good. When your store is filled with luxury items and your shoppers are pleasant, upper-middle class ladies, people are happy customers. Pier 1 may be the opposite of the DMV. It smells great and makes me want to have a place of my own so I can collect glassware and decorate with incense burners and candlescapes.

Anyways, my rebellious self is grumbling and clunking like the old furnace in the basement of my heart. I should be so content, so joyful, so ecstatic with what God has given me, and yet when I see opportunities to even take a peek at other stuff, it's like I'm camping out in the parking lot at the paper mill, whose odor should make me puke. God's stuff is so much better than any of the crap I'm sniffing.

So He's called me to lead this small group for the girls in my church's youth group. I'm completely inadequate, unprepared, and unqualified to lead them in applicable Bible discussions. Let's see what He does with this...

30 April 2007

Feelin' down again...

"We must pay more careful attention, therefore, to what we have heard, so that we do not drift away. For if the message spoken by angels was binding, and every violation and disobedience received its just punishment, how shall we escape if we ignore such a great salvation?" - Hebrews 2:1-3

"Today, if you hear His voice, do not harden your hearts" - Hebrews 3:7-8

"See to it, brothers, that none of you has a sinful, unbelieving heart that turns away from the living God. But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin's deceitfulness. We have come to share in Christ if we hold firmly till the end the confidence we had at first." - Hebrews 3:12-14

This whole situation is still not getting better. It's affecting my body; I feel a physical weight pushing down on my spine, I feel muscularly weak, and I don't feel like eating at all. And I'm dehydrated.

The weekend, however, was great. Quite a refreshing time to be carefree and adventurous with my dear Wallace. We did a Fountains of UMD tour, trespassed, frolicked [in a special way] through the thunderstorm, and I met some new friends. Saturday was Maryland Day, so campus was v. crowded. We ate Chick fil-A!

That night we slept in cardboard boxes on the Mall by the Washington Monument for Displace Me - a media/awareness event held by Invisible Children [dot com], where they showed us video testimonials of folks in Uganda who are in the displacement camps where the government put them to keep them "safe" from the rebel army. Last year they held a "Global Night Commute" which was basically reenacting what the Ugandan children do every night to avoid being abducted by the rebel army to be made into child soldiers or sex slaves. This year we were made to experience what they deal with in the displacement camps, except we had clean water and no AIDS or malaria. We had a 6-hour fast, and then were only allowed to eat water and saltine crackers. We called people and wrote to congressmen to spread the word in hopes of the U.S. or the U.N. doing something to bring peace to northern Uganda.

The next morning Wallace and I hit up Starbucks before church [how convenient to have one between dorm and campus], which was run by Maryland Christian Fellowship and was cool. We sang a "yee-haw" song.

Directly after lunch we got a call from Horatio, who had come to pick me up. So Wallace and I parted ways again. Hopefully we'll hang out again this summer - when we'll do even more crazy adventure-type things! Whee!!

The drive back with Brandon was good. It didn't even get dark until we got home. We stopped in Philly for supper with Y-von at a place called Brigid's. I got gnocchi in pesto, mm!! It was rather tasty. We also got to see her studio in this church; Ruben Ghenov also works there! How exciting! I hadn't seen Gali since he was a baby; what a cute kid!

I had a somewhat sleepless night, followed by weaving class, geometry quiz, crafts class, geometry class, glazing and then a chat. In some ways, I feel like Paul....

"I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.

And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature.

For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do - this I keep on doing.

Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.

So I find this law at work: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in my inner being I delight in God's law; but I see another law at work in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members. What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God - through Jesus Christ our Lord!"
[Romans 7:15-25]

Thanks be to God indeed. Jesus will rescue me from this body of death. I want my sinful nature to die. I just hate sin so much I want it to be completely gone from my life; separated as far as the East is from the West. I know that I'm forgiven, I just want to sin no more. I won't be pressured into sinning anymore. It just burns a hole in my gut, like too many of those Warhead candies.

And I'm seeking counsel within friends. Sometimes it's hard for me to ask for help, so if you've got wisdom or advice about certain sorts of things, please just pour it upon me. If I'm not in the weaving studio this week, I'll be at the Chris House [need time in the chapel], or my phone is usually on if I'm not in class.

*le sigh*

And I feel like such a b*t*h for complaining about my stupid life problems when 5 year old kids in Uganda are being abducted from their starving, infected families to be forced to carry a gun that weighs nearly as much as they do. How do you feel about that?

oh, and pardon my french.